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August 18, 1995 at 12:57pm I came into this world weighing 4lbs and 1oz. I am so grateful to still be here after all I’ve conquered since birth, especially the last 6 years. This post isn’t to reflect on all I’ve overcome, but to talk about what’s to come!

This chapter will be like no other that I have ever experienced!! Yes, I am turning another year older and wiser BUT there’s been a secret I’ve been keeping from you guys! It has been one that I’ve been eager to share with the world, but it’s one of those secrets where you have to hold it within your inner circle first before telling everyone.

Chapter 26, will lead to Demi being someone’s mama! These last few months/weeks have been one that’s somewhat indescribable. I’m just beyond grateful that my treatment plan while battling cancer didn’t affect my fertility, which was one of those things I was worried about. 

God has continued to show his grace and mercy over my life. He always shows me time and time again that my life is in his hands and anything I feel is taken from me he always multiplies it!

I am also grateful to be doing all of this with an amazing partner and loving support system! I know this has made such a positive impact on my journey that makes this so much more exciting! I’m so blessed to be on this journey and able to carry a beautiful healthy baby into this world! HERE’S TO CHAPTER 26!!

Hey Y’all!! I know, I know….IT HAS BEEN A WHILE!! My apologies for my absence, I will try my best not to stay away this long again. It was a topic that has been on my heart the last few days and that topic is manifestation. 

There are so many things we will want in life that we may sometimes doubt will ever happen. 

For example, we can think that finding love and someone to treat us right is simple. We all have probably experienced that it hasn’t been that simple. From heartbeat after heartbreak, at some point people give up on that dream of true love because it seems no matter the good effort they put in, things never go as planned.

Another example, we can be dedicated to getting into college or a specific career path. We believe we put in all the necessary work and took all the right steps that should ensure our success. Only to turn out all you’re receiving are doors closing and hearing the word “no or denied”. 

Going through being let down can be extremely devastating and can deter you from what you once desired. My next question to you, which at some point I had to ask myself the same: “Are you going to give up or already claim the victory in everything you want out of life?” When my answer became, “claiming victory” my entire mindset did a shift.

All of what you wish for in life may not always be at arms reach when you desire them, but start to believe that you will receive those things in perfect timing. I remember desiring things that I wasn’t yet prepared for and one of the worst things that can happen is if you get what you want and mishandle it. Even when it’s rough not receiving what you want in your timing, remember that all things are aligned for your good even when it doesn’t feel good. Continue walking in it and believe it’s already yours.

REMEMBER, DEMI IS FOREVER ROOTING FOR YOU!!!

While going throughout life there will be some decisions we make and circumstances we find ourselves in that we may not be the most proud of. These circumstances and decisions are things we share with the close people [spouse, family, friends, etc.] in our lives. We can all assume once we tell those who love us something that disturbs them, they will be offering their opinions/advice soon after we’re done talking.

Now y’all….if you know you don’t want someone’s feedback PLEASE state that at the beginning. For example, “I really need to vent and get some things off my chest; can you please just be my listening ear with no feedback in return?”

Now we know that there’s some people who can not resist giving their input; so they’ll tell you up front. And more than likely if that is the original person/people you wanted to share with, you’ll still share with them. Now I’m not in denial of the fact that there are people who can be very judgmental, yes–even when their circumstances are worse than yours.  

Why You May Feel People Are Judging You–Fear of Judgment:

 *not saying this is true for everyone*

-you want to please others

-have social anxiety

-spend time comparing

-you judge others

BUT this is to shed light on those who genuinely care about your well-being and want to offer advice because they want what’s best for you. Most of us have mastered knowing the people in our lives who are “for you” and knowing how to remove those who are not for you. So if you’ve done the work in removing those that aren’t for you then you should automatically know that those in your circle are only giving their input to help you.

Sometimes we need to take a moment to realize everyone is not judging you. We need to be able to take “criticizing/real talk” in a light where we can dissect it because more than likely it’s some gems in the conversation that will help make us better. Take those conversations in a different light because you may be missing the key information you need to begin flourishing. I am someone who is ALWAYS ROOTING FOR and I’M SURE YOUR CIRCLE IS AS WELL!

I’ve heard countless times how a person wishes their spouse would support them more. When I mention the word “support” I’m not speaking financially; it’s the support that money can not buy. Most of the time it’s motivation to continue to push through, which is mainly that emotional and mental support. It’s very difficult to go through life’s ups and downs with a partner by yourself and at the same time still feel alone. I’ve been there before and it’s not a good feeling. It’s also something that you do not have to put up with, especially when you know you’re supportive of your spouse. Relationships should never feel one sided; it is a partnership!!!

I was reading a blog post on Psychologytoday.com and they identified 4 kinds of support: 

• Physical and Emotional Support:
  • Listening and physical touch [hugs/holding hands]
• Esteem Support:
  • Expressing confidence in your partner/providing encouragement/words of affirmations
• Informational Support:
  • Giving advice
• Tangible Support:
  • Helping to brainstorm solutions to a problem

I’m EXTREMELY grateful for the partner I have now; who’s been my partner for almost 2 years. Something I appreciate the most is the fact that nonfinancial things I once begged for he continues to give me without any ask. Having a supportive spouse can push you so far into greatness and success. Your partner signed up to be your “person” in every aspect of life and always make sure the same support you want to receive that you’re giving it also. 

Relationships aren’t always easy, but it takes work and compromises.  If you need more of your spouse be sure to ask them; remember no one can read your mind! I hope this blog post can give you more insight on how to be more supportive to your spouse because the support makes a huge difference. REMEMBER: DEMI IS ALWAYS ROOTING FOR YOU!

June 1, 2020; today makes one year since my second hip replacement. June 15th will be 3 years since my first hip replacement and it’s nothing but GRATITUDE!  As I type this reflection I can’t help but think about the journey as a whole. I’ve been through A LOT; sometimes I can’t believe all of it is a part of my life. Most events seemed like something that I would watch in a movie, but I know this is the life I was given for a reason. I remember when talking about my journey was difficult; I’m grateful I have gotten to the point where I talk about it freely. My journey has helped many people get through trials within their lives, which means a lot because making a positive impact on others is something that’s very important to me.

 I know I use the word gratitude a lot, but that’s the word that describes my life. I realize that if God doesn’t do anything else for me he has already done enough. I was born premature, so I came into this world fighting for my life and ended up doing it again at the age of 19. That battle led to other trials that some do not make it through. This is why I do not take a second or day of life for granted; my outcome could’ve been totally different because many people have not made it through the battles I’ve experienced.

 I hope this reflection has encouraged you to continue pushing through whatever trial you are up against because once you get through it the feeling is an unexplainable one. But I challenge you to speak positively over the trial; share the trial while you’re going through it; and the outcome once you’re through it! I can promise I’ll continue this thing called life with gratitude and the drive to make an impact every change I get! I’M FOREVER ROOTING FOR YOU!

HERE’S TO ONE YEAR FROM MY 2ND HIP REPLACEMENT;

ALMOST 3 YEARS FROM MY 1ST HIP REPLACEMENT [6/15/18];

AND ALMOST 4 YEARS A LEUKEMIA SURVIVOR [3/10/15~~7/7/17]!!

It’s a phrase that’s been playing back and forth in my head the last few days as I’ve been talking to different people about things they’re going through and experiencing. That phrase is “FORGIVE YOURSELF”! There’s so much we’ve done to others and things we’ve allowed people to do to us that we spend time constantly beating ourselves up about it. 

Here’s some tips I gave April 2020 around this topic that I feel will be beneficial again:

Tips for Forgiving Yourself:

• Focus on your emotions
• Acknowledge the mistake out loud
• Think of each mistake as a learning experience 
• Quiet the negative messages of your inner critic
• Get clear about what you want
• Take your own advice!!!!!
  1. It’s easy to tell others what to do, but at times you have to take your own advice
• Seek professional help, if needed

These tips may not work for everyone and you may not need every tip, but please take what you need. These are the action steps that helped me get out of a dark place. This is when I would spend time beating myself up about the hurt I continued to allow and accept to happen to me. 

The reality is we have to come to the realization that we can not control other people’s actions and how they decide to value you, BUT you can control what you sit and deal with. And even once you’ve allowed certain things once you heal and grow from it, it’s something you’ll more than likely never allow again. REMEMBER: FORGIVE YOURSELF! DEMI IS FOREVER ROOTING FOR YOU!

There will be events that take place in your life that will tug on you mentally and emotionally. When things tug on you in those two areas it will also raise your stress level. When your stress level is raised it will decrease your lack of focus on things that are important, such as work, your hobbies, family, and your goals in general. So, what do we do? TAKE A BREAK TO REGROUP!!!

We have to make it okay and normal to take a step back when we need to. We should not feel we have to struggle to hold everything together while working through stressful situations. Tale a moment and figure out what’s best for you. When my aunt passed away March 26 I knew it would affect me; it started affecting me beforehand when I knew her health was declining rapidly. I knew I would need some time to regroup; I decided to take some time off from work. 

During my time away from work I:

-took time to rest

-focused on Talks with Demi t-shirt line

-had some fun/date nights

Benefits of Taking Time Off:

-boost creativity and passion

-promotes a healthy work/life balance

-lowers burnout

-you’ll be more productive when you return

-reset your mental state/focus

-SELF CARE

Yes, it was definitely difficult going back to work after 10 days LOL, but I was refreshed and was able to refocus on my work tasks more clearly. So, if you’re someone that is struggling with taking a step back here’s your push you need: TAKE THE BREAK!!! Remember, Demi is FOREVER ROOTING FOR YOU & WANTS THE BEST FOR YOU!

Some of you may be wondering where I have been for the last few weeks! I hope everything has been going well for each of you. Life was on the up and up; I was extremely proud of myself for placing a pre-order of 50 shirts with my first bulk order. I was just happy with the outcome of me stepping out on faith and being grateful for the results. 

Just as well as everything was going well, everything began to fall apart. I’ve been distracted with family trials coming about. One of my aunt’s who I was very close to began to decline severely and later passed away Friday, March 26, 2021. Saturday, April 3, 2021 my family and I escorted her to her final resting place. 

I’ve just been trying to wrap my mind around all of this. I am at peace with the fact that she’s no longer suffering and going through so much medically. I had to gain the strength to write some final words to her because she was deserving of it. 

Here’s my final tribute to her that was apart of her obituary:

What do you say about someone who has made such an impact in your life?? 

The first thing that comes to mind is “thank you”. 

Thank you for everything you’ve instilled in me; you’re one of the strongest women I know. You’re also one of the people who are credited to helping save my life and for that I am forever grateful.

I’m going to miss our talks and the extra push you’ve always given me when I needed it. Thanks for always telling it like it was! I will keep every piece of advice given and use them during my time of need. Let’s not forget your bomb cooking! I can taste those ribs as I write this!

Wow auntie, this is really hard for me. The bond we had was irreplaceable. I have peace knowing  you’re no longer in pain and suffering; job well done beautiful. I will miss you so much, but I’ll love you forever and keep your memory alive. I know you were greeted by Grandma and PaPa and your sisters at the gates; tell them I love and miss them. 

Love Always,

Your “Favorite Niece”

As I continue down this path of grief, which I’ve been through several times I will try my best to stay focused on the goals I’ve set for myself. This is something I know my aunt would want me to focus on and just keep pushing through as best I know how. I know it will be hard because I already miss her so much. Prayers of strength are greatly appreciated. I am optimistic that I will continue to make her proud, as well as those who have passed on before her. We all will experience things we can’t control, but I remind myself daily and I’m reminding you YOUR ATTITUDE TOWARDS THINGS IS EVERYTHING. Even in this state I’m currently in, know that I am FOREVER ROOTING FOR YOU &&’ WISH THE BEST FOR YOU-HAPPY APRIL!

Hey Y’all!!! It’s been a few weeks since we’ve had a talk; few weeks too long! I hope you all are doing great and have been pushing through the first three months of 2021! I’ve been extremely grateful for two specific things that has taken place:

• I had a photoshoot to celebrate my journey of how far I’ve come from when I was diagnosed with Acute Lymphoblastic Leukemia six years ago [3/10/2015].
• With the photoshoot I also launched my “Talks with Demi” t-shirt line. You can see the photos and t-shirt information to pre-order a t-shirt on Instagram: @_talkswithdemi.
  • T-Shirt Options:
    • Faith Conquers Fear
    • There’s Purpose in Your Pain
    • Tell Your Story…Somebody Needs to Hear It

These two things lead me to the topic at hand “Faith Conquers Fear”! Talks with Demi became a business August 2020 because I envisioned things to go further than just a blog site and YouTube channel one day. I had been contemplating on coming up with a t-shirt line for a while!!! I kept putting the thought at the back of my head instead of putting action behind it.

Once I decided to take this seriously I began to brainstorm, talk to family and friends about my ideas, and just started executing. The support has been amazing so far and I’m extremely appreciative. I’ll be putting in my first bulk order this week and I’m so excited!! We never know how the leaps we decide to take will go, but one thing we do know is that if we don’t take action on our thoughts/ideas they’ll never blossom.

I don’t know where the rest of this year will go, but I’m speaking improving health, blossoming ideas, success, happiness, and prosperity over all of our lives. Stop sitting on those wonderful ideas that could possibly lead to more success in your life. Use this post as the sign for you to take the necessary leap of faith you need to. Fear doesn’t belong when you’re on the pathway to success. Faith is all you need to get by; be grateful in advance for everything you want out of life. Someone once told me something they read before, “success is doing what you said you would do”. I’M FOREVER ROOTING FOR YOU!!!

Whew this topic right here!!!!!! We as people are naturally people pleasers whether we want to admit it or not. It’s also that very reason we find ourselves in situations where we are extremely frustrated and overwhelmed. Let’s take a look at some signs that show us we’re overextending ourselves.

Signs You’re Overextending Yourself:

-You spend time worrying about other people’s circumstances

– You say “yes” to everything

-Commit to things without thinking it through

-You don’t quit when it makes the most sense personally

How To Overcome This:

-Acknowledge that you do it

-Prioritize what’s most important

-Pause/Take Time & Say No Assertively 

-Spend time with yourself 

-Ignore Expectations

-PUT YOURSELF FIRST!!!!!

Stop worrying about what someone will do about your “no”; if you can live with it that’s all that matters.  Do you really believe someone else’s needs are more important than your own??? SAY NO-Choose yourself! LEARN HOW TO BE COMFORTABLE SAYING NO AND OTHERS NOT BEING OKAY WITH YOUR DECISION!! Once you get comfortable with that life will become a lot more simple. Also, stop taking on things/people that break you down instead of help strengthen you. I want to leave you with the fact that you have the power to say “no”; you don’t have to grant everyone’s needs and wants. This way you’re not run down and can have time to focus on the things that are important to you.

Another thing to take in consideration it’s okay to show up for those who have your back, BUT more than likely the people you are drained from overextending yourself hasn’t done the same for you. Keeping that in mind I’m literally begging you to put yourself [your kids if you have some] at the center at all times NOT others!  REMEMBER: BECOME COMFORTABLE BEING UNCOMFORTABLE-CHOOSE PEACE! I AM FOREVER ROOTING FOR YOU!