Blog Feed

As humans we’re only happy about change  when it benefits us and feel it’s elevating our lives. We are excited when change has to do with promotions, a new car, new house, or new relationships for example. What’s your perspective when something changes that you didn’t expect?  What happens when a relationship or friendship ends? It’s hard coping with that when you planned a future with someone or when someone leaving your life causes you to experience the feelings of heartbreak and loss. As I mentioned in my last post, “It’s okay to feel all of the feelings around your circumstances, but it’s also your duty to yourself to make sure no matter what’s going on around you that you take care of yourself mentally.” Don’t dwell on what’s no longer, focus on what’s current.

In life, it’s sometimes hard to realize that everyone isn’t meant to stay in your life for a lifetime. People are assigned to your life for a reason and a season. Every interaction and time you have with someone has a lesson behind it; one that you might’ve not learned without that individual coming in and leaving your life. So instead of dwelling on the absence of someone, ask yourself: what did that relationship/friendship teach you?

Sometimes people are still in your life because you’re settling. Some reasons we settle:

• Denial
• Comfort
• History
• Love
• Fear of being alone
• Thinking of others feelings

You are the CEO of your life; that means you are in charge of promoting, demoting, and even terminating people from your life. Sometimes it’s not always about people leaving your life sometimes you have to make the change. Everyone isn’t meant to elevate and go to the next level with you. If you can’t take a stand for your life; you’ll end up in a lot of situations that you could’ve prevented.  Always remember to be an advocate for yourself and your own happiness. Thanks for stopping by to talk!

Circumstances–a condition, fact, or event determining another. In life we will all be hit with circumstances; some that we may have helped cause and others that we had absolutely nothing to do with. Circumstances can include: health issues, relationship problems, losing a job, car issues, divorce, heartbreak, or even death of a close friend or loved one. 

What will be your mindset when things happen that are out of your control? Will you fold under pressure? Or will you adjust and reflect on the things you can change? In every situation you face it’s mind over matter. It’s okay to feel all of the feelings around your circumstances, but it’s also your duty to yourself to make sure no matter what’s going on around you that you take care of yourself mentally. 

Having a mindset of growth is ideal; you have to have faith that no matter what’s going on that one day it will get better. If you believe your circumstances will take you under it will become your reality.It’s okay to embrace your challenges and setbacks  while pushing through them. 

We can all learn something from these things. Challenges will build character, create opportunity, and teaches strength and resiliency. These things will shape you into a person you never knew you could be. If negative thoughts are constantly in your mind, you will likely have a negative outcome. A negative mindset won’t help you get to wherever it is you’re trying to go. 

When circumstances arise:

• Gain control: handle things in a positive light
• Be grateful for what you do have
• Be mindful of the company you keep
  • Surround yourself around people with your desired mindset and not those who have a negative one

There’s no straight path in life; if it was we would all pick it. So when things begin to zig zag out of your control, what will you decide to do?? Until next time!

In this day and age everything is posted on social media. Social media is a great way to discover new ideas, to network, build a brand and an audience. Social media can also be used in a sense where people are posting their everyday life, as well as their accomplishments or even materialistic things they own. This can become an easy way to begin comparing your life to others. Not only with social media it can take place with conversations with family and friends on their progress in life. You might begin to compare the progress someone is making to the progress you are/are not making. Even if this isn’t purposely done, sometimes it’s naturally done. A psychologist Leon Festinger acknowledged this theory in 1954 called Social Comparison Theory. He suggested that people have an innate drive to evaluate themselves, often in comparison to others.  

Some thoughts people can naturally have:

• ”I’m 22 I still haven’t finished my degree; I’ll be in undergrad longer than 4 years.”
• “My mother was married with children by 35; I’m 34 and single and can’t seem to find someone.”
• ”Their business is booming and I can’t seem to get people to purchase items from me.”

Always remember we are our own worst critic; there might be something that someone acknowledge about you that you’re doing well that you might not have thought of. This may take place because you’re so busy worried about what you have not accomplished yet. It’s good to know that you want more for yourself, BUT it’s also a good thing to sit back and celebrate the Little Wins; it’ll make you appreciate the Big Wins even more when you get there. We talked about this to say, make sure in life you’re going at your own pace. Life is not a race. 

We all may have similar goals in mind, but that doesn’t mean our route and timeframe to get there will be the same. There might be some things in life you have to experience, such as struggles that will help build patience and character. All those things will make your success story more significant than the next person.

“Go  easy on yourself. Everyone has their own pace. Persistence is as important as productivity.” -Nancy Grossman

Until Next Time!!!!

Some live every day of their life going day by day without no desire of knowing their purpose. Living life solely on survival and making money. Why is knowing your purpose so important? I’m glad you’re here and reading this to find out. Starting off let’s address what the word purpose means. Purpose: the reason for which something is done or created or for which something exists. Have you ever looked in the mirror or had the thought “Why am I here; why do I exist?” I can’t speak for everyone, but I myself have definitely had this thought. We’re not put on this Earth to simply just exist; we are put on this Earth to make an impact in the lives of others.

• Reasons it’s important to find your purpose:
  • It helps you live a meaningful and value-based life
  • It puts things in perspective of what’s important and what’s not
  • You’ll have a life full of passion, which will unlock your true potential 

• Ways you may discover your purpose:
  • Sometimes it will take tests and trials where you’ll find your purpose through an unpleasant time period in your life-health issues, divorce, unemployment, death of someone, etc.
  • Sometimes it’ll come from a conversation with someone you care about or maybe even a complete stranger; these people telling you what they appreciate most about you.
  • If you’re religious, it may come by seeking God for your purpose and him giving you direction and confirmation.
  • Sometimes it may just be simply a feeling within or a conversation with self.

I wouldn’t be completely truthful if I didn’t add in this next part. Sometimes your purpose in life can be something that you’re not comfortable with. Your true purpose in life can take you out of your comfort zone and for most of us that’s not a pleasant feeling. The bigger picture of it all will be revealed once you come to grips with it and life will be so much more worth it.

In life we are all assigned to people; people that you may not currently know. Seeking your purpose in life will lead you to those people you are assigned to. We are all put on this Earth to make a contribution to the world. I was once sitting in an expo, I was asked to reflect on a question. I want to leave it with you,  “What’s your reason for breathing?”

–Thank you for giving me your time. I hope this helped you in some way; look forward to our next talk!

Be yourself; Everyone else is already taken.

— Oscar Wilde.

I was born and raised in Detroit, Michigan. I am an Alumna of Wayne State University, I have a Bachelors of Social Work degree. I’ve been best described as fun, empathetic/caring, loving, giving, and a survivor.